Friday, April 29, 2005

Asphalt Angels

Happy Birthday Dale.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Lesson #2--HIDE!

"If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will." I swear, I need Greg Behrendt on my ass 24/7. Wonder if his wife would let me borrow him? Nothing sexual, nothing romantic, anything like that. Just to follow me around and knock some freaking sense into me! Watching this guy on Oprah yesterday was awesome. I need my own personal Greg to help me kick some losers out of my life. I'm WEAK. lol.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Lost Treasure...

"Just because you like to lead doesn't mean he wants to dance." I'm telling you, He's Just Not That Into You is the greatest book ever written! Thank you Greg Behrendt! Thank you Liz Tuccillo! And thank you Oprah, for reminding me I had this book collecting dust on my bookcase! I'm sure the men in my life probably aren't...or won't be so thankful...but who cares? If they'd treat me right, then we wouldn't have a problem! I love you guys! If anyone reads my webpage, I'm telling you, you HAVE to read this book! Oh, and guess what? I found my keys! I lost them at Wal-Mart back in December. I have a post about it back then...it was around the 23rd. Anyway, I was in Wally World on the 23rd of THIS month, and just happened to ask about them since they're remodeling and redoing the store...and sure enough...there they were! Now I don't even remember what half the keys go to...

Monday, April 25, 2005

Huh?

Ok...I uncovered this random useless statistic in this wonderful internet world...any ideas on WHAT is going on? Apparently 6,500 people are injured by their toilet seats every year. WTF?? Ummmm...I don't even WANT to know. Tiff, I think my biggest mistake, especially regarding him, was something along the lines of what Anne Frank once said. Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart. Ok, so not everyone, but...I don't know. You know what it was with me. Big bad therapist/social worker I am, I thought I could save him. Save him from what, I never did figure out. Himself? How do you save someone from that? But then, of course, it was inevitable that instead of saving him, he started dragging me down with him. So I had to save myself instead. But you know, in spite of everything, I still want the best for him and want him to be happy. I just hope that whatever he's chasing, trying to run from or drown...whatever the case may be...gets worked out before it's too late. So that's that. Moving on...give me your thoughts on the toilet seat thing!

Believe...

...as we grow older, it becomes difficult to just believe. It's not that we don't want to, but too much has happened and we just can't. I'm not so sure I believe in much of anything anymore...I work each day like clockwork, just trying to make ends meet. I could kick this bad world's ass if I could just get on my feet. Just so very burnt out on the whole day to day routine of this whole thing. I need a vacation from my life. JT, I come see you!

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Right Here Waiting...

How old is this song?? :-P Anyway, I heard it again tonight, and it really reminds me of you. Whatever happens with us, you've owned my heart for 4 1/2 years already. And I'll gladly give you a lifetime, if God and fate decide to ever let that happen. If I see you next to never, how can we say forever? Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you. Whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks, I will be right here waiting for you. I took for granted all the times that I thought would last somehow. I hear the laughter, I taste the tears, but I can't get near you now. Oh, can't you see it baby? You've got me going crazy...Love you like the ocean, baby. And since I was eyeball deep in a crisis on your birthday, and didn't get a chance to post it then, I'll tell the world now...HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!! Can't wait to see you next month! OH! WHO WISHED SNOW ON ME AT THE END OF APRIL?!!?!! COME ON!!! This is in FREAKING sane! It'll be May in a week, and it's SNOWING here! WTF? We had a thundersnow earlier...which was wild. Not sure I can say I've ever experienced that one. Hmmmm...anyway, TAKE YOUR SNOW BACK! NOW!

Spank me pink...

Yep...that's what color rejected crayon I am! Hmmmm...ok then. I got this off Stef's site, and I hope this link works. They're actually pretty fun, and thankfully, very short quizzes that give you some insight into yourself. Apparently I always have to be the center of attention and I'm very ambitious and driven and a "bright shining star"...so long as I have that attention. lol. Me? NEVER. Anyway, here's the link for that: Blogthings. A lot of things have been going on lately, and I've barely slept in the past 3 days. But, out of respect for this person in my life, I'm not going to post it here for the world to see. It's a very personal thing, and something that needs to be and will be worked out on its own in time. But you know who you are, and you know I'm always here for you. I certainly hope these past few days proved that. Anyway, that's all I have to say about that. I'm outta here. Have a good one!

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Life Lessons

I learned 2 very important things this past week: #1--you don't need to buy fancy water filters and spend all that money. Just get a pitcher, pour you some tap water in it, and let it sit out for an hour. According to an environmental scientist, 97% of the stuff evaporates anyway. Wow...but who wants to wait an hour to drink their water??? I know I certainly wasn't born with that patience gene. And I'd say it's a safe bet that when others are thirsty, that little gene, trait, whatever, goes out the window with them too. And the #2 thing I learned is this: you just need a bigger box of crayons. *Sigh*...wouldn't it be nice if all life's problems could be fixed that easily? :-P Ok, it's a GORGEOUS Sunday out, and I don't know what I want to do first, but I guess I better get doing it, whatever it is. So I'll catch you later. Hadn't said hello in awhile, but I hadn't been here, so...HELLO! And...goodbye!

Monday, April 11, 2005

...when penguins live next door...

aaahhhh tiff...last night felt absolutely AWESOME. i didn't know i had it in me. although i did pay for leaving him there like that later in my dreams, but hell, dreams i can deal with...all i have to do is wake up! yay for me! granted, it wasn't the hellacious payback i'd been dreaming of, but BY GOD, it was something. it was 4 weeks in coming, and it felt GREAT. at least now he knows (i hope) that i'm not kidding, and that it really is over. i'll be his friend, but that's ALL i'll be. as long as i'm stuck in this stupid pissant town, i might as well. it'd sure make things easier on me to have him as a friend than as an enemy. i have enough of them in this stupid place as it is, for some reason that i still haven't figured out. the only thing i have to say about that is that i'd rather be hated for who i am than loved for who i'm not. i didn't ask to be pretty, i didn't ask to be smart, and i didn't ask to have this crazy funky personality...but i'll be damned if i'm gonna change who i am because some immature bitches are jealous. if they'd just let go of that jealousy and lighten up a little bit and LET IT GO, then they'd love life too. but tiff, thanks for always being my friend and having my back. don't know what i'd do without you. these battles are mine to fight, but it helps to have the support. girl, you are my crutches that hold me up, the rock that helps keep me grounded, but also the air that lifts me up. you have no idea how unbelievably thankful i am that in this crazy mixed up insane world where nothing ever stays the same and the only thing you can seem to count on is things changing and people hurting you and leaving...you're still there, and you've always been. hope you always are. here's to 16 amazing years...can't wait to see what the next 16 will be like, 'cause these have been UNREAL.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Wanted:

I figured out what I want...and yes, Taylor, I stole this from you. I want a man who will lead me down the beach with his hand over my eyes just so I can discover the feel of sand under my feet. I want a guy that'll wake me up at dawn because he's just bursting to talk to me and can't wait another minute, just to find out what I'll say...and I want a guy who'll polish my toes for me and bring me chicken soup (or something) when I'm sick and doesn't think twice about the fact that I look like hell...so, where are you? Actually, I know I found him; he's just too macho manly to admit that he really would do all those things for me. He's already held me and taken care of me when I wasn't feeling well on 2 different occasions, and never thought twice about it or mentioned it afterward. He's called me in the middle of the night or showed up at my house on several different occasions wanting to see me. It's ok...you don't have to say anything; I know you care about me. I remember what you told me at 2 am one night not so long ago. And I'll never forget, as long as I live. Your secret is safe with me. :-)

Saturday, April 02, 2005

Be Not Afraid

Pope John Paul II
1920-2005
"Our beloved Holy Father has returned to the house of the Father"~Archbishop Leonardo Sandri
Rest in peace...

Friday, April 01, 2005

Some Gave All

Our county had its first (hopefully only) soldier to die in the war in Iraq on Good Friday. And for some reason, it's bothering me way more than it probably should, since I didn't even know him. But he was only 23...supposed to get married December 31st of this year. I just keep thinking of all the plans, hopes, dreams, everything that'll never come true for him now. My condolences and prayers definitely go out to his family and his fiancee. Instead of planning a wedding, she now plans a funeral. Instead of wearing white, she'll be wearing black. His funeral is tomorrow. I saw the procession as they brought his body home. It was nice and heartbreaking at the same time to see the veterans saluting his casket as they drove by, the American flags waving everywhere, and his fellow Marines and the police officers escorting his body home. Can't even begin to imagine what it would be like to lose someone close to me in a manner such as that. I honestly don't think I could make it. The families who have suffered that loss and who have been able to go on with their lives are definitely much stronger than I could ever hope to be. And so, even though I didn't know him, this post is to honor the memory of Cpl Bryan James Richardson, Kilo Company, 3rd Battalion, 25th Marines, RCT-2, 2nd Marine Division. Thank you for loving your country enough to believe in what you were doing, and for making the ultimate sacrifice to do it. Rest in peace.