When the going gets tough...

...the tough (and the smart) get the hell outta Dodge. And that's exactly what I did. But I find myself looking over my shoulder at what I left behind. I read somewhere once, "Don't look back unless you intend to go that way." Well, I have to disagree. I think sometimes you have to look back to see how far you've come. And to keep from repeating past mistakes. Heaven knows I've made plenty. But...I have few regrets. Does that make any sense? Can we make mistakes without having regrets for those mistakes? My opinion is yes, because I'm living proof of that. Looking back at where I was, I can see how far I've come. I'm a million miles and years from the girl I used to be. I don't even know who that girl is anymore. I like who I am and what I've got, but God, I loved who I was and what I had. I've always thought that when I left Tennessee, I left the best part of me. Truth is, I still do. But things change. I've changed. Tennessee has changed. Would I even be happy there now? I already know the answer to that. Yes, I would. Without a doubt. It's my soul. I've been missing it a lot more since moving here, but realizing that he accomplished his goal and made it back really drives home the sad fact that I haven't. Again, another lifetime ago. But if anything, I remember how much he loved Tennessee and how he wanted to be back there. It took him awhile, but he made it. Guess I'm taking the scenic route. He's no longer in my life, and hurt me amazingly badly leaving it, but I realize now, thinking about it all, I've let it go. Because I am really, truly happy for him. And it makes me want to make myself happy. Have you ever been so in love with a place that it killed you to leave it, and the one thing you want more than anything is to go back? I swear, if Tennessee had an ocean, it would be my idea of Heaven on earth. My second thought is, what the hell am I doing in West Virginia?!?!